She had her ways.

He sat there in silence. Like a storm had just kissed him. He was less silent more still. His eyes spoke a story which his dry lips could never narrate. His hair seemed rough and scattered. That was never his style. There was an open  book on the table, of which the wind generously blew away the pages.

His silence now started to trouble her. And she asked the obvious. He looked at her and then looked away. She was at her patient best. She went in and came back with some coffee. He looked at her again only to look away.

While she placed one mug on the table and held the other. She looked concerned. He then dug himself into the book lying on the table and stopped by a page.

He looked at her. She looked back attentively. He put before her a line written by his beloved. He found that book years after her death. The lines read,"for every time you lay in silence, remember I will come to you in the warmth of that sunlight. And if it ain't sunny, remember me as a beam in that sparkling night."

They both sat quiet starring at the sky. It was a sunny day and after a while he said," those were her last words for me, and I find them today, on a sunny afternoon so bright". She knew not what to say. She could feel his pain. She gave him a warm hug.

When he tried to embrace it he found himself alone in the balcony. He then in a deep voice said,"and she had her strange ways".

Water

She thought they had abandoned her & dried away. Things, would just pierce her heart and move on. As moist as her eyes looked, they weren't.

In his name, she knew they will return. And in abundance. She knew they will not come alone. They will bring along the pain she continues to push behind.

She knew, it might feel light having them around, but she feared being left with a heavy heart, long after they are gone.

She still suppresses the pain. And does not think of him. She still chooses to keep them away from her eyes. They often make them look moist. But she hasn't felt water. Its been a while. A worth while.

Maturity.

Shattered. Numb. Indifferent.

Real. Defied. Accepted.

Fall. Walk. Lay.

Smirk.Experience.Grey.

Sing. Dance. Dance. Watch.

Crib. Cry. Listen.

Share. Express. Hide.

Friendly. Selective. Loner.

Burn. Dwell. Let go.

Observe. Assume. Know.

Seek. Grant. Endure.

Learn. Teach. Learn.

Witness. Witnessed. Perish.

Look up to. Look Down Upon. Respect.

Deny. Accept. Ignore.

Deceive. Believe. Mature.

Calling Upon.

I stare at my phone, sometimes for hours together. There are times when I know who to call and dial the number. There are times when in spite of having 500 contacts on my phone I call no one. Very diligently I scroll through the names, one by one and sometimes in great speed. Very softly I stop by a few, read the names and then the numbers and move on. These are the times when I know I need to talk to myself and the fact I don't come on the contact list.

I often grow silent to myself and do the in tuned things to my best. I run away from the burn out and quietly tuck away the cribs of my heart. I feel some thing within me needs my attention. And I look at my phone for hours together and don't know who to call.