Old Soul.

An old soul, 

Seems to have taken over the words, 

Written, felt and auto written. 

This is not me, 

Or may be it is, 

I don't even know. 

How with a hundred Hellos,

There is silence in the soul. 

How with a reasonably busy day,

There is time which doesn't go. 

How it takes a thousand sounds, 

To cut a familiar echo, 

Etched in the heart. 

And how it is just this Echo, 

You really need to feel home. 

May be this is not me. 

It is someone else, 

An old soul, 

Auto writing this all. 

What happened?

 

Love, why are you so hard?

Weren't you meant to be simple & pure.

Who pushed you to this?

What made you so inconsistent?

We have lived that light, 

Emitting from the brokenness of hearts.

We have stood, 

Strong in a sea storm. 

We have been the voice, 

Of unsaid feelings. 

We have been the testimony, 

Of each other`s strength. 

Love, what happened?

 Why are you so hard?

Today. 

Closing...

Letting go,  

Of all the glow worms...  

 Time to find,

Ones own light. 

You belong.

You know the prick of barren is so inconsequential, inadequate...unassuming, yet alive.

Life embraces these in abundance. The feeling of everything on the outside and nothing on the inside. The sparse empty space that is hollow. Where there is life, without a hint of living. Where there are heaps of forgotten promises and dust accumulated in the tightly sealed cocoon. The existence of the otherwise dead.

And then one day you came along and it feels like barren is greeted by a touch of soft light, and rain and wind all at the same time. You bring in the seasons, the greens and reds, the smiles and treasures. Like the dew on the grass, like the chirp of the birds, like an innocent prayer in the heart like the rainbow in a nude sky, like the stars that gaze right back at you when you look at them. That sense of a conversation, a never-ending slumber, a peaceful aroma of the fresh brewing love.

There are eyes that can take you to places with unimaginable levels of passion. Of breaking open every wall of disguise and emit the real you. A vision so sharp to pierce through and know, just know even before it is expressed. Those are the eyes you adorn. That inspires a smile, shy and light. That takes one along and lets one rest in them, like they are forever.

Look at self again, every evaluation fails. Every understanding of self eludes. And suddenly like the rain, the heaven falls all over from the sky and one wonders and just wonders how? Like the feeling of being safe, protected and complete, in that one embrace. And that`s where we belong. Because of you I belong.

The sense of being away and being there. The unruly bond and an innate feeling of being consumed. Knowing the heart resides you proudly and shamelessly. And knowing that you are there. When all falls apart and things change, knowing you will not.

You know how dreams tell you stories and how the souls are connected beyond the physical self. Like how a soul recognizes another as their own, even without knowing. You are that soul. You bring in the peace and the comfort like sleeping on a swing under the sun. Like in a womb. Like old books and bookmarks with love notes. Like rain in a desert storm.

Now every whisper into the universe is throwing back abundance of love, happiness and dreams. Leaving nothing to be anxious about. And nothing else left to pray. For today I look at you and hold you in the eyes and heart, that`s where you belong anyway.

You need.

...And it`s true,

You need you the most.

Touch The Peace.

Embrace silence,

This moment, 

Calm down, 

 Touch the peace. 

The quiet river,

Smell of barren land, 

Sun splashed sky,

One way conversation...

With the wind.

Empty roads,

Tree kissed streets,

Stoned pathways,

Into the hills,

Of abundance.

Feel the skin,

Drenched in dew,

Dust and light,

Touched. Teased. Kissed.

 Let the trees, 

Unveil secrets

In a language

You don't understand...

And it feels okay!

Follow sunlight,

Into never land,

Be mislead,

Lost. Lured. Loved.

Dressed in cocoon,

Swinging in the sea, 

Wash off, 

All that`s dried up,

Somewhere deep within. 

And let it pain, 

Pain a little more, 

To be...

Cured.

Let the sunset,

Burn you,

Let it descend,

Within somewhere.

Share a word or two,

 Be inaudible.

Let it, 

Shout. Break open. Heal.

Embrace Silence,

This moment,

Calm down,

Touch the peace.

Deeper than the sea.

Slowly,

I begin to get you.

And it feels,

Like you are the perfume,

I wear with a smile. 

Letting you be,

The quietest ever. 

And letting me be,

The one who is not. 

It is the mind that talks, 

And the words follow. 

The mathematical phrases, 

And facts at display.

The simpler words,

And emotions at play.

A conversation deeper than the sea..

That`s what we were,

Meant to be. 

Nothing to lose, 

Yet nothing to gain. 

And your favorite nothing, 

For everything unsaid remained...

Could it mean the world to me?

Meanings are precious, 

Connections are unique, 

And we become the storytellers, 

Of everything life has been.

Its nice here, 

What could we want more?

 The conversation has just started, 

And we are looking,

 Outside the door, 

See things differently, 

Yet understand the difference... 

This is what we were meant to be, 

Deeper than the sea. 

This is for us to know, 

And understand, 

So lets say...

'Nothing' may be :)

Forbidden together.

Peace with reality.

In me,

I found you.
Memories stored,
In every cell,
And every speckle of being.

In me,
I found the wound.
Old, dry, yet fresh.
Painful, forgone,
Yet intact.

In the journey,
of self.
I found me,
Every step outwards,
Was a step inwards.

In the abstract nothingness,
I found me,
Evaluating it all,
Like a third person.
Impressed, yet disturbed,
Proud yet concerned.
Connected yet so aloof.

 In contradictions,
I found meanings.
Of life, and after,
Of peace and disasters.

In you,
I found me.
Insignificant, purposeless,
Ignored and prosaic.
Like a moment that wasn't born.
Like a feeling that never existed.

In this non-entity,
I found peace,
Made with reality.

Water

She thought they had abandoned her & dried away. Things, would just pierce her heart and move on. As moist as her eyes looked, they weren't.

In his name, she knew they will return. And in abundance. She knew they will not come alone. They will bring along the pain she continues to push behind.

She knew, it might feel light having them around, but she feared being left with a heavy heart, long after they are gone.

She still suppresses the pain. And does not think of him. She still chooses to keep them away from her eyes. They often make them look moist. But she hasn't felt water. Its been a while. A worth while.

Maturity.

Shattered. Numb. Indifferent.

Real. Defied. Accepted.

Fall. Walk. Lay.

Smirk.Experience.Grey.

Sing. Dance. Dance. Watch.

Crib. Cry. Listen.

Share. Express. Hide.

Friendly. Selective. Loner.

Burn. Dwell. Let go.

Observe. Assume. Know.

Seek. Grant. Endure.

Learn. Teach. Learn.

Witness. Witnessed. Perish.

Look up to. Look Down Upon. Respect.

Deny. Accept. Ignore.

Deceive. Believe. Mature.

Calling Upon.

I stare at my phone, sometimes for hours together. There are times when I know who to call and dial the number. There are times when in spite of having 500 contacts on my phone I call no one. Very diligently I scroll through the names, one by one and sometimes in great speed. Very softly I stop by a few, read the names and then the numbers and move on. These are the times when I know I need to talk to myself and the fact I don't come on the contact list.

I often grow silent to myself and do the in tuned things to my best. I run away from the burn out and quietly tuck away the cribs of my heart. I feel some thing within me needs my attention. And I look at my phone for hours together and don't know who to call.

Selfless corporate world

Submit in the name of wisdom..

Walk away with the meaning of creating space...

Shrug off with an intension of creating opportunity

Dump load in the name of trust is other`s capability...

I fail to understand this 'selfless corporate world' :)

The Chosen One

It has become so difficult to write anything. I guess my words have begun to fail me. Haven't been so silent before, silent to myself to begin with. I think I have stopped talking to myself, the usual fight of what I am, and what should be... haven't felt so speechless and inexpressive.

A single life shows you everything that you could think of.. everything you thought is not for you.. everything you thought you never deserved or may be you did! One single life with so many changes, complex situations, challenges, unchanged damages, broken dreams and the wild wants...One life to live it all and a lifetime to deal with.

I don't know where in this maze am I stuck... I don't think I even care to know now.. How does it matter, I feel stuck anyway! Everyone dreams of a perfect life.. a perfect memory a perfect moment.. what about those who don't dream of any of that? Someone like me, who wanted to live with surprises.. ya even the nasty ones..

I think when you don't dream of your prefect life, you may end up attracting more nasty than good surprises.. or may be you pass through the heaviest fire because you become the chosen one...ya right "The Chosen One".

So who is this chosen one.. and why is he the chosen one? No, i am not going to bestow some gyan of positivism.. I wish I was that positive to have any such gyan to emit. Or may be not.. I don't really need to be so idealistic anyway.

Chosen one becomes the one who sees his life twist and change every moment, with no happiness to stay longer, or sadness to end soon. Chosen one becomes the person who strives to make a difference everyday, and fails to make any. Or, feels hasn't made any.

He becomes the person who expects a lot from his own self. Hard work, harder effort, genuine feelings become his conscious traits. And the harder he works, the longer it takes for him to reap the fruits. The harder he strikes, the chances of his failure increase.

The chosen one, sleeps every night, hoping for a better tomorrow, after having pondered over enough about the present and the past. He strives to fight every battle he has to undertake, with self or others. He tries to live, to love, like the first time ever, every time... he says what he feels and feels what he says.. he think to talk and sometimes thinks after talking :)

For the many things he feels he has done just perfect, end up featuring in the list of mistakes in his life... for every moment of passion he expresses in the name of belief, faith or love.. feature as illogical in the list of many.

The chosen one, can live in the name of love, can give all he has.. in the same sinful name of love.. can lose all he ever possessed or gain everything he never wanted.. he lives for what his heart makes him feel... mind does not take the lead.. mind does not take nothing.. :) or may be.. sometimes.. something!

The little wish of heart, ends up becoming his reason to live.. the smile of someone important, becomes his agenda.. falls asleep, dreaming he lived his happiness, in the happiness of his beloved and sheds tears over his beloved's sadness.. he is one with people.. his vision can penetrate, deeper.. he can see, what others don't or what others don't want to... He says the heartfelt..

No doubt the chosen one goes through the roughest touch of God, destiny and ill fate at times, but he still wishes to live that beautiful life with surprises.. ya the nasty ones too..

Sometimes, in my solemn heart I feel, I am the chosen one.. sometimes.. in your solemn heart, you may feel that you are the chosen one too..... the fact remains.. that the chosen one passes through the heaviest fire, runs through the worst, in others vocabulary... in his own.. its just his life.

Safely dug somewhere are his dreams.. his child like tales and his silly imperfections.. may be it is this cocktail, that makes a chosen one... may be it is this undying need to be alive that makes a chosen one... may be it is his failures and his constant effort to strive hard, that makes the chosen one... yes, that same you.. and that same me, make the chosen one!

Arranged

Love me, for what I may not be, judge me, for what may be your perception!
Leave me, for no sin... yea; it is to do with you, not with me....
Patterns in this jigsaw puzzle, all disjoint, but relevant... simple, but indirect, real but deceptive!
Truth love is immortal, Reality, all love does not meet completion...
Truth, it is imperative, Reality, it dwells with time....
A hundred wishes, a hundred incomplete.... a simple acceptance... the world of love....
Yes, it is arranged... a weird risk... a unique exploration.
Be afraid of the deep river, or take that first dive... live with the inhibitions, or open up to a whole new world...
Smiles and giggles are here to stay,the warmth of love would not decay!
Take the leap, give it a chance....at least, you'd know, you gave it your best shot... :-)

What's Up???

What's up?
What could be?
May be a nothing...
May be a :-)
May be a surprize...

But, when we ask
Do we reallllly want to know?
Do we wish to listen, actually :-)
May be sometimes,
But may be not!

Best things in life, are never shared...
The worse are also hidden...
What are we then trying to find out anyway???
Dry sarcastic humour... over the nothings of life?
Or a window into someones heart?

Does anyone really know you?
Do you really know someone?
May be you do, at least that is what you`d like to believe :-)
May be not, perhaps, that is the real truth of the matter!

Everything beautiful around us, is yet to be born...
What are these relations for then anyway?
Why us being a 'social animal' our truth...?
Why talking to someone, becomes a habit.. a cute little habit?
:-) its so funny, because life is such a perishable journey...
Moments are just dying to end....

What are these associations for....
Why do we meet... to part.. or part to meet, perhaps...
In spite of knowing nothing, we still form attachments....
Some last for a lifetime, some perish with time...unfortunately thou..

Nothing is permanent,
It's funny, we step into everything, knowing it is permanent...
This conviction, for a myth... is certainly funny...
Make believing, that all's come to a stand still...
That one life, will suffice the lust to live...
That one life, will be complete, by the end of the story....
Stories, that are just that, stories.... :-)
And, reality is just that, a strangeee real thing!

But its nice the way we live,
Each day, in the most carefree way...
Its nice, we live, anyway :-)
With the mountain of sorrows, and a glimpse of happiness...
Its nice, the way we talk... and share...
Well, almost nothing! :-)

So, lets begin with... What's up....
I genuinely want to know ..... I swear ;)

The Real World....

I believe that there is a beautiful World out there... just waiting to be realized, filled with all the sweetness of honey, and freshness of the dew... Where the sun shines, with a smile to add that extra glitter, where every innocent wish is heard and completed...

A world that lets you be who you are, lets you realize the greatness within... with a spectacular smile that becomes a habit.... A place where there is nothing to worry about... and nothing to run away from... filled with the glory of happiness and unending contentment...

A little world that knows no boundaries... that understands no restrictions.... that understands only pure love and passion.... where a simple life begins to live each moment in time... where the beauty of the surroundings seems far more clear than the ugliness...

This world is waiting to be explored... the beauty awaits the eyes and the heart that can preserve it... this world is your own.... deeper somewhere, where nothing is right or wrong... where everything is beautiful and sweet... every innocent wish experiences completion...and every wound seems healed.

We search for happiness in others, waiting for some one to fill in the emptiness or perhaps the numbness of each feeling... but what we forget, is that world which lies within, waiting to be realized, that world of self and truth... the world where nothing matters, where only a little smile can cause immense pleasure...

Sometimes we see it, most of the times we ignore it... failure in life is temporary... what is permanent is this state of mind... that sees beauty in everything around... where red means love before danger... where good holds more importance over not so good...

Its the way we chose to see... its the time we take to recognize the greatness of self... it is that world we often come across, but seldom understand. It is the world of YOU… where your belief is the only that matter, where your perspective becomes the reality, where you chose to find peace in the most uncalled for situations…

It’s hard, it’s unbelievable, but it’s true…. There is a beautiful world out there, just waiting for you to realize!!

UNANSWERED

Shall the truth remain such that it lives long enough, it really deserves to live? Will genuine efforts sustain all the tumors and the rain...will they still remain valid and unforgotten?

Not always do I question life, rather seek answers within, but sometimes you are forced to ask about this unanswered puzzle, knowing very well, that there are no answers at all. Why do we try to decipher the unknown or run behind the unattainable? It is rather silly... but strange... we all do it... knowingly!

An endless gloom grips, when you figure that it is a battle you fight with yourself when you stop by to answer all the 'why(s)' and ultimately feel defeated hands on.... I feel the same today. There is an urge to get my answers, but no one can really answer them. At such a platform of life, nothing really helps, not even your favourite astrology book :)

I guess I'll have to stay put, and wait till this feeling is dug deep enough to be forgotten... I ain't a loser... but what else can one possibly do. My dreams are wishful enough to see me happy when I am asleep.... but reality??? Well, reality is just so damn REAL..... :)

OBSERVATION....

An Observation : Every time I say a weird sounding Hello! on the phone, it is always someone important calling me..... :O like Boss, Corporates.... etc.. :(

And then I get to hear an apprehensive voice saying..... "ahhh Can I speak to Geetanjali?"

:D "Ahh well.... Speaking"... is what they get back from me.... :)

Some people cannot believe that I can sound so weird, So they even care to confirm... "Is is really Geetanjali????"

Alas! .... ya it is very much me, just acting normal... for a change.... ;)

HUMAN

"Woh Insaan he kya jo badal jaaye".... and this I say with pride and shame... Pride because I have not changed, but shame because people around me have changed.

I have always been a person who spoke my heart. Who said what I felt and did what I wanted to, without hesitating or making it sound diplomatic. I am proud, of being this way.

People have hated and loved this behaviour. But you know what, it is very difficult to call a spade a spade. It is difficult to be a straight talker and to be bold to say things exactly the way they are.

I am proud that I can speak my heart, and that I have not changed this about me. And all those people who are like me, and who feel that this world will not accept them for who they are, then listen up.... people will accept you as you are, if you accept yourself as you are first.

It is not important to be perfect, it is not important to be right... but it is important to be true and more important to be honestly bold. There is not anything in this world that can take away who you are from you.... apart from your own self.

It just takes a minute to say nice things, things that people like to listen, things that are sweet. But it takes courage to say the truth and truth could be bitter or sweet.

A human being is known as a superior race, because we can feel the other living beings pain too. It has just so happens that people usually ignore that, and become so self - centered, that they can’t see the other person's pain. Even animals can and empathize with the other animal/ human's pain... and we the seemingly superior race, are today defeated!

There is nothing left in this World, and nothing will be even in the future, if we change and run away from our basic nature of being superior. Decay will also not hold us worthy. It is thus important to rise. Rise above all the odds and live life for others too. It is paramount to be a human first.... a human filled with humanity....

In the house of God, every one is paid for all the good and bad. And I have seen it happening in my life. I have seen people paying for their deeds. But this is not a reason or a threat for us to do something good. It is for ourselves we need to rise!

Rise my friends.... Rise to be human.... and Rise to be who you are.... there is nothing else that could be more important. Stand up for everything that is important for you...the ones who don't, dissolve in this rat race... and the ones who do... rise to be true humans.

Courage - is in the blood of every Indian, but it’s just that we have forgotten it, or have dug it deep inside. But courage is the only fuel to be who you really are. It takes courage to stand against something.... its always easier to be with the flow. But then again... if you chose to do anything, you do it for yourself... for your superior human race who can think and conquor!